the art of following through

Jan 12

music of da blog >

The concept of a new beginning tends to lie in the hands of specific points in our lives. Moments in which a change is presented to us as a gift- whether we put it on our wish list or not. Making change is hard, but I think the most encouraging aspect about a new beginning is that you're already uncomfortable, so why not use it to your advantage? Change forced upon me has always been easier to handle than deciding to change myself; I have learned the necessity of adaptation to new environments, scenarios, and people. But when I take a look inside myself and pinch at the parts of me that are not required to change (at least at the moment), I look the other way.

Here I will be working through how I can combat this in myself and possibly utilize the idea of forced change to encourage me to do things I would not normally do. Maybe some of this will resonate with you too- maybe even enough to change.

But as always, take everything I say with a grain of salt.

Every new year I find myself making a list of “goals” and if I am being honest, these are usually things that I have been meaning to do or enact all year. I find that they have nested themselves in the back of my brain so much that I now physically embodied them as a part of myself. Not the aspect of achieving of the goal, but the lack thereof. For example, I have been wanting to quit nicotine for the past 3 (?) years, and it seems that instead of personifying the version of me that is a non-smoker, I have been playing the role of a girl who is trying to quit smoking. I fear this is due to a lack of many things; most of them relating to self-discipline and planning, but also because my mindset relating to this goal is not aiding.

“Last year I abstained
this year I devour

without guilt
which is also an art”
― Margaret Atwood

I have thought long and hard about why things I want for myself sink into the background of my life, resurfacing only when I want something to ruminate and torture myself with. I clearly see that this is not productive but I simply just keep patching up the holes with shitty ass scotch tape instead of buying plaster.

After a bit of dissecting myself, the following is is why the aforementioned occurs.

For a girl who believes heavily in a positive mindset and its role in manifestation, putting myself in the future tense concerning my goal is not going to put me in the mindset to achieve it.

I am quitting smoking (future)

Vs.

I quit smoking (past)

The way in which we speak of the world bleeds into our everyday lives, no matter whether you want to call it manifestation or delusion       (both are good in my mind.)

I often find myself with a list of dreams and intentions, yet somehow, I don’t make the first move to turn them into reality. I get caught in the haze of wanting to do it all, but not knowing where to begin — and in turn, the ideas start piling up on me that I am suffocated by choice and unable to distinguish importance. In 2025 I know that I want to create more. But what does that really mean? This goal is so broad and lets my mind wander too much. Holding myself to a standard of more specificity will feel much less overwhelming. So, in 2025, I would like to make two blog posts and one piece of art per month.

I’ve also realized that setting goals that are rooted in reality makes all the difference. For instance, I dream of my words nestling into people’s hearts—a task that feels vast, but rather than screaming at any alter other than my own, I will simply start by whispering my love into his ears, and telling my niece how it feels to be a girl and write this blog… and eventually I will reach you through a book.

Lastly, and this one is a bit depersonalization-esc of me, but I think about the world a lot, and it often makes me lose sight of motivation and drive. I fall into a spiral of “there’s no hope,” so why try? I believe this is just another way for the addiction demon in my brain to try and rationalize a bad thing to me. But I think I need to remember that whatever time I do have, needs to be spent without fear… For living with such crippleing fear is quite the same to me as not living at all.

“I've lived the life of a man without teeth, he thought. A life of a man without teeth. I've never bitten, I've been waiting, keeping myself for later - and now I've just ascertained that I don't have teeth anymore”

- Jean-Paul Sartre

I’ve come to realize that the version of you that you want to become cannot physically or mentally exist in the way you are living now. It’s impossible—it doesn’t fit within the mindset, habits, and patterns you’ve grown comfortable with. That version of you lives somewhere beyond this, built on choices and perspectives you haven’t yet embraced.

This is how I plan to grip my mind and habbits and soul by the neck:

You start by accepting that change isn’t about waiting for the perfect moment or magically transforming overnight. It’s about making one unfamiliar choice, then another, and another. It’s about leaning into the discomfort of growth, because staying the same is no longer an option if you want to eventually meet the future version of yourself that does not make you turn your head away in shame.

The new year is this magical little pocket of time—it’s a fresh start, a blank slate, and it’s practically dripping with the energy of possibility. Use that. Let it inspire you to finally fucking do the changes you’ve been dreaming about.

“What goes too long unchanged destroys itself.

The forest is forever because it dies and dies and so lives”

- Ursula K. Le Guin

Conclusions to my own confusion

- Inspiration is a spark—it’s the glimmer that nudges you toward becoming more. Watch those you admire, not just for their successes but for the quiet rituals that make them glow. How do they greet the day? What gentle habits shape their world? Borrow fragments of their rhythm, like the way they guard their mornings or carve out sacred time just for themselves. Let these glimpses stir something in you, not to imitate but to ignite.

- Sometimes, transformation begins in the tangible—the spaces you inhabit, the things you touch. Rearrange your room so it feels like a sanctuary, dye your hair a color that feels like the version of you you’re becoming, or let go of relationships that no longer fit the shape of your heart. Change doesn’t have to be seismic; even a small ripple, like signing up for that yoga class or hanging new art, can shift the current. It’s less about the act and more about the energy it brings—the quiet signal that you’re ready for more.

- Dreams are soft whispers until you give them structure. Write it all down—how will you start this new chapter? What will your mornings feel like? Map out the small, specific actions that turn wishful thinking into forward motion. Lay out your favorite outfit for the gym, craft a playlist that makes you feel alive, and set goals that feel playful instead of heavy. Momentum doesn’t have to roar; even the tiniest step is a beginning.

- Life isn’t about perfection; it’s about showing up. Maybe today you stumble, but tomorrow? You pick yourself back up, no guilt, no drama. Each tiny decision—drinking water instead of coffee at night, putting your phone away before bed—builds a quiet kind of trust with yourself. Start where you are, as small as you need to, because even the most delicate seeds grow into something beautiful.

- Be patient. Change unfolds slowly, like morning light creeping into a room. You won’t wake up tomorrow as someone entirely new, and that’s okay. Celebrate the little wins—a kind word to yourself, a task crossed off the list. When you fall short, meet yourself with grace. Building a life you love isn’t about rushing; it’s about layering joy and intention over time, piece by imperfect piece.

Remember, the person you want to be cannot exist in the current way you live, the only way is to change. So why not try?

That's all I got, I think? Hmmm..

Anyways, I hope you have a good day,

-Hope Joy

The brain to the blog <3