“go get a real job”
music of da blog >
I made the mistake of taking my anger fueled by the trump administration out on TikTok. (I know, not a smart move or even a rational one at all.) I guess I just needed some confirmation from the outside world that anyone else has this egg of rage in their brain, that cracks with each newsline consumed. Yet, I did not get that reassurance at all- in fact, I got quite the opposite. Maybe this is my second chance at a cry out into the world for reassurance that the way in which I am comprehending the world right now is not an overreaction or outlier from the experiment that is the year 2025.
The TikTok I posted had to do with trump (my small act of rebellion in this blog is saying FU to the AP Style guidebook and adding to my spellcheck dictionary that trump is now and forever only lowercase.) Anyway, I posted this video talking about how trump’s dumb freeze on the distribution of federal funds was a threat to my job, as where I work is grant-funded mainly by the government. It got an okay amount of traction; maybe somewhere in my brain, I wanted it to go viral, but I did not account for the impact of unimportant people who hide behind a glowing screen (and probably also under a KKK mask). There were a lot of comments from these people saying that my job must not have been that important enough for trump to deem a necessity, which we all know trump knows exactly what is best for the American people…
The thing is, I know in my heart and my soul that the job I am currently working at right now is so crucial to the well-being of society, and I have never been as fulfilled in a position in my entire life. However, expectedly, during the day of that TikTok, maybe combined with the fact that I would (and still probably might) lose this job, I had let their words infiltrate my thoughts. This trickled down into my work and my actions for the rest of the day. I am not usually one to let other’s opinions of me have any effect at all on my view of myself and my capabilities.
I am a hard worker. I have been working since I was fourteen and have never been without a job, sometimes working multiple at a time. I worked all through college, and in between college, I had jobs for sometimes just 2 months while I was living somewhere, and I’ve had jobs for 4+ years… I have been supporting myself finacially since I was 18.
Anyways, in honor of my not knowing the true labor of a “real job,” I present to you a walkthrough and rating of every job I have ever had in no particular order.
Keep in mind that that some of these jobs, I only worked for a couple months in transition phases of my life.
A Maid-Rite type place (1 year) 1.2/10
I was probably under working age in the kitchen, frying food that should be banned by someone (hope is deteriorating with this administration) and making loose meat sandwiches. I like to blame part of my turning vegetarian on this place. I smelled like grease and grossness, and oh my god, I do not really want to remember more.
Lifeguard (and swim lesson instructor.) 8/10
Aquatic Center (4 years ish?)
I would work the morning shift for extra hours, which consisted of getting to the pool at 6am to sit in a chair for 2 hours and then clean the bathrooms for another hour.) After which I would go home and go to volleyball practice or lifting or teaching swim lessons and then back to lifeguard for the rest of sun filled hours. Then, I would sometimes work the evening shift at the job I mentioned below. Now, I know this is not “hard work,” but compared to those who did not need to have a source of income during school, this was hard work.
Community pool (2 yearsish?)
I also lifeguarded at a pool in a community center with my Friend Jarrett, and then we would get Taco Johns (a Midwest thing) right after.
My college’s pool (4 years)
This is my one life hack for anyone reading this before they go to college. Get a job lifeguarding. First of all, you learn applicable first aid and are trained to handle scary scenarios, and while I have only had to use these skills a few times in real life, they are even now nice skills to have while going about my day-to-day. (Baby need CPR? I gotcho.) Secondly, I would often just sit there beside my coworker (usually George (hi George ily)) and do homework. Like, getting paid to do homework? Yes, please, and I would recommend finding a similar job in college.
hi George
A co-op-ish grocery store. (4 years) 9/10
Now the hardest work for me in this job was directing people to the weird obscure products that were apparently in one of the aisles of the store (a lot of goat products that you didn’t even know could be made by a goat.) Other than that I would just sit at a register and read a book until someone needed me to ring up CBD, Lylac, Goat Milk Fused Insensed, Hand Soap.
This was actually one of my favorite jobs. It had a chokehold on employing Grinnell College students, which, as a high schooler, is a gateway drug to a good time. Along with that, a lot of my good friends worked with me, and I got extremely close to a few people who I otherwise would not have.
me n my coworkers at prom
Little store in Boulder (a summer) 3/10
For my loyal readers, this is in the era of motorcycle boy— I was staying in Boulder, Colorado, for a chunk of my summer. There was this little shop (like gas station with no gas mixed with a whole foods mixed with an 864 square ft building.) I thought that I would be working the register at this place, but they had other ideas. So honestly, for 8 hours a day I would walk around this shop taking stock of items, unloading the stock from the trucks, restocking the shelves, and doing it all over the next day. I would walk 20-30 minutes to this job and oh my god my body just ached. I am so grateful to have only had to do this job for a shorter amount of time because I think my back is still recovering.
Little cafe in Oregon (a summer) 6/10
When I got a scholarship to live in Oregon for a summer and write, I, of course, would not let this opportunity to pay for a few more college fund bills pass me by. I worked as a server at a cute cafe, this is mainly where I learned a lot more skills ranging from actualy pouring a good espresso shot (and making a heart with the milk (this was such a proud moment)) to growing my capacity to hold empathy for the people I would meet.
I do not think this cafe is still around because of Covid, but I think of my time here quite fondly.
Graphic Designer (1 year) 7/10
This was another part-time gig I had in college; I simply did graphic design work for my college’s marketing department. I learned how to use the full Adobe suite here, which I am forever grateful for because I think InDesign was created to cause a fissure between visual designers. You can check out some of my work here, btw hehe.
RA (3 years) 2/10
God, I loved to complain about this job, but the free housing during college was another thing that a girl paying her soul for an education could not let pass by. There is not much I want to talk about here other than that I really hope that other colleges have a residential department that does not have a one-year turnover.
This job also led to a lot of kind friendships (and hookups) that would not have occurred in the pain of doing “rounds” at 11 pm and having to tell horrible football frat boys to shut the fuck up and stop smoking cigarettes in their rooms.
Worked at an art gallery (1 yearish) 4/10
THIS WAS ALSO… during college haha. I would work at this art gallery that was owned by my school… Art gallery is a bit of a stretch, but it was quite a sweet job. Working events was always an interesting experience, and now I know how to correctly hang up art, so I think it was worth it.
Videographer for my college library (1 yearish (position died during Covid lololol)) 3/10
This was as a baby freshman in college, I planned, scripted, shot, and edited videos for the library which I do not include in my portfolio for quality reasons. And as a girl who at the time did not know how to mark a keyframe on Premiere Pro, it was a great opportunity to try and tackle the Adobe Suite.
Bartender and Server at Cheesetic in Virginia ( a summer) -5/10
I have worked in some pretty bad run places, and this takes the cake. It was like a wine and cheese shop (at the time, I didn’t like wine and I still don’t like cheese) and also a restaurant??? I knew nothing about cheese, and I don’t think I have ever lied more in my life…
Mmmm, yes, this aged goat brie cheese goes great with this weird ass pasta with chunks of fried chicken on top and this very specific and way too expensive white wine please tip me 20%.
No one there knew what was going on, and the tips were pooled. One time, my manager did not come in, so one of the head people trained me in like 10 minutes on how to be a manager and then left… So you bet your ass I put “Manager” on my resume cause in this economy, you gotta really stretch the truth (and technically, it was not a lie.) Anyway, I think the owner turned it into something else after my departure, and I hope for the sake of my coworkers, that it worked…
Bar-Cart girl at a golf course (a summer) 5/10
If you’re a girl who wants money and you are angry at old rich men who suck, I say work at a golf course and funnel their perverted money into your college fund. This is not for the weak, though, and I would only recommend it if you have a strong sense of not letting things get to you.
Community Events Intern (a summer) 3/10
Ahhh, this was during Covid, and I bet you can imagine how hard it is to be an events intern during a time when events should not be occurring- at least in person. I do not remember much from this other than I had to do a lot of graphic design on Canva and had to make this wonderful virtual version of a Fourth of July parade…. Lmao, it’s so bad.
Intern Graphic Designer (a summer) 6/10
I did graphic design/ social media things for this wonderful holistic lady in Madison, Wisconsin. She was so sweet and taught me how to actually sell my time and run a business by myself.
Social Media Marketing Manager (1 year) 7.5/10
Ahhhhh Ireland. This job was also one of my favorites, though Jesus Christ, it should not have been bestowed on one singular person, let alone a fresh-out-of-college 23-year-old girl. I know there is this idea of social media managing people that aligns that with a rat that is taught to press a button to release a pellet of food, but if you are truly working in a professional position relating to social media marketing, you know this is far from the truth. I think my job title should have truly been Social Media Manager, Marketing Manager, Designer, Event Planner, Photographer, etc.
Bartender (a summer) 9/10
This was the last position I had before my current one. This one tested my patience like no other but also is glued in my memory with pink sparkly gorilla glue. I learned how to properly bartend from this dude who I had never even met before despite being a frequent visitor to the town the bar was in. I had never met a human who was truly so for other people in a way that was not just genuine, but also consistently reminded me of the good humans could be. He went to bartending school and was so thrilled to share his knowledge with me in a way that was unlike any other teacher I had ever had in my life. He walked me through each drink slowly and did not get even slightly annoyed when I asked him a question. It was almost as if he was truly pouring actual love into each whiskey sour he made, and was trying to teach me this skill as well.
My job now 9.9/10
I love this job; that is it… And it’s remote which oh my god I love even more.
Anyways, suck it dumb random cowards commenting on my TikTok because I know in my heart and soul that I am unbelievably smart and hard-working and so worth more than they could ever possibly see for themselves. I hope you feel similarly about yourself because that is how we get past people who are projecting their lack of self onto others in search of a worthwhile ego. But also, go get a real job.
That's all I got, I think? Hmmm..
Anyways, I hope you have a good day,
-Hope Joy
The brain to the blog <3
↓↓↓↓
